My Collection Of Awakening Experiences Continues No III

2-2by Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
nearly one year ago, on February 08th 2016, I shared with you this post called “A Collection of True Awakening Experiences II”, which was a Free E-Book project inspired by the wonderful Barbara Franken – to bring together the stories of many female voices, and their unique experiences on the path to authenticity and truthfulness. I did so, because I love projects that are born from collaborations, I saw a big chance to inspire lots of other women and men, and because I was giving myself a blessing for my birthday – which is the 8th of February.
This year I will make another leap into the unknown, and record an interview that I was invited to by the lovely team of  the awakening platform “The Spiritual Voice”. I will let you know for sure, when the talk goes online!! But in the meantime I did not want us to miss out on a review of the past year, and the steps I was able to make.

In what I posted for 2016, I spoke about the last ten year of my personal path of growth and enlightenment, and the dreams I have for the year that back than was lying ahead of me. Looking now at all the leaps and turns that I have taken in the meantime, I first of all feel like expressing my gratitude to my wonderful spirit guides, my loving dog family, my magnificent friends and all the other wonderful creatures, from the physical as from the non physical realm, for making my life such a magical ride of light and fun.
The Tarot Deck that I was talking about before, is developing beautifully. It is demanding a lot of attention and seams to have a very clear picture of how it want’s to be brought to light. I try to be the best immaculate mother to it, that I possibly can be, just follow all the corners the flow is taking and watch the tables turn. With my personal work load, I am about 1/3 in – my partner is very inspired in her painting process, and so we hope to be ready for publishing by the end of the year.

But not only that this baby is developing just fine, in the meantime I was inspired by international world events, with the idea for a book about creativity in 2017; as this is one of the major energy fields this year is powered with. My partner and I, also started talking about the value of a book about the creative process itself, as it is quite fascinating how deeply we are called to listen to the constant changes the deck is demanding from us. We have to be awake, present and willing to serve, when ever we sit down and concentrate on sharing what we receive.
eI also still adore my income work. Every time I AM spending hour with another being in a one on one training, I feel like another wonderful seed has been brought into blossoming. To have the chance and watch people go from the insecure thought of “am I crazy to think of feel a certain way”, to self-acceptance, self-love and forgiveness – which than leads for them to strength, stability and clarity in their guidance; is always a rise in my own inner degree of divine bliss.

And than, as the end or the ultimate test for every awakening seeker – there is of course the lovely family. I went back home to visit my core family during the summertime of 2016. Oh what a ride it was!! I started of with meeting good friends of mine, who had invited me to come by at their house and do some magnificent energy work with them, which I happily did. I spend several days with this closer circle of very like minded people, than I went to meet my mother. Now you need to know that karmically my mother is the only significant person o my system. She turned 85 last year and is in general in good shape, but what I noticed was a change in mindset.
When I was a child, my mother was a woman who would work and push thru every physical pain you can possibly imagine. She did so to such an extend, that I actually all my life considered her very cruel (a mix of her personal history and as well one of the B-Sides of her numerological vibration of 18/9). Maybe also because one day I had watched her slip with the ax – cut deeply into her meaty knee – take a deep inbreathe, than simply remove the ax – slip a bandage on and continue. As a little child, that was a shocker to me!
And now this same woman is talking about how normal it is to feel physical pain all the time, when you are of her age; how normal it is to not want to engage with life and seriously talk anymore, when you are of her age; and a lot about her loving connection to my beloved brother Martin, who died on Valentines Day 2011. I occasionally talk with my brother too, but I do not share any of her mindsets about aging or the physical body, and even that I did not mention that – my mother was triggered by vibration.

During this Vienna visit, I took many more trips to my mothers house, in order to spend at least 2-3hours the day with her; an amount of time I thought she would be able to handle without exploding on me in one way or the other. I have to confess that I overestimated her much more than I could even ever had imagined in my darkest childhood hatred ;-). The pattern of freak outs ended up with a frequency of 3-4 days, in which i watched her build up her frustration about “not being able to understand my world”, and than unloading this frustration in my presence.
I was fine with that, as I had sensed in my first week of traveling, that I possibly would not come back for a very long time – which also included a big chance that I would not meet her alive again – so I saw it as my last chance for a personal service to our relationship. Now let’s be honest, with today’s technology even long-term physical distance would not make any difference to a family that is close, but in our family the principle of war against everything that is bigger than the single ones imagination was “the word”.nOn my last day of meeting with family members, I came to my mothers house in a state of deep sadness about my brothers absolutely ignorant behavior, and even more the abuse he showed for the brotherhood laws for the Golden Age of Aquarius (a collective human theme, that always sets off my inner alarm system when I see people breaking the hermetic laws). That is something, I can not explain to my mom – and she is not good in holding space for other peoples pain. I tried to avoid a last clash and asked her for some time and space on her balcony, to deal with my own feelings and left for a little conscious breathing session.

But than – like I said – she is not good in handling that other people insist on having feelings ;-). She exploded over the fact that I would allow myself to come to her house, in a state of need for myself – and not perfectly poised and ready to chit-chat with her. In a moment of totally loosing it, she screamed at me “in your presence I cut all my feelings off”; to later tell me in confidence, that she also thinks of me as “the Angel of Death” – because both, my brother and my father died, when I had visited my family. It took me about five month to understand and integrate the details, of how this moment of my life was an incredible blessing.
Time to realize, that the tapestry of this ultimate rejection, that had grown from the moment on I started building my little fetus body in her womb, would unveil the last karmic strings to me that had connected us. By now, a “freedom to naturally BE ME” is the domineering feeling in my life.
Last week I had the pleasure to receive a reading of my personal Maya Calender interpretation from a dear new friend of mine, the amazing artist Gerhild Resch. She has the amazing ability to channel in a shamanic journey, how the different qualities of ones inner powers are feeling and if they are in need of any adaptations. I will happily report about the incredible details she unveiled to me in another post, but lets just say a little right now. Her explanations opened with telling me, that she had ever only shared a world like mine for one time before during her long experience, and that was in a reading she did for a child. The world she discovered in my sacred heart, was in her words that of “Alice in Wonderland” ;-), and that is just how I feel my life to be.

Dear Ones, I recently ended a piece with the following words: “I hope you are filled with a spark of inspiration right now, that you are motivated to remember the wonderfully relaxed ways in which you have been playfully creating as a child, and that you will allow them to guide you to a new mindset. No matter if you are planing to become the most important innovator of the Golden Age of Aquarius, or if you are just looking for new ideas to create your personal life, a playful approach is always helpful”. And believe me when I am saying with all my heart “I acknowledge what an incredibly blessed being I AM, to look at what I just shared with you and realize – I myself have very well followed my sparkling advice ;-)”!

Love and Blessings!

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Cry of the Millennial Witch

dloveDear Friends,
in March this year I shared an article called Are you a truly spiritual person or simply full of it. In this piece the author talked about the difference in exchanging dogmas from the old social paradigms, for dogmas and words from the new age movement. To actually come to collective changes, we might have to dig a bit deeper. In the last two days I shared with you the articles about “
What I Learned From Integrating The Divine Masculine Healing Part I” and “What I Learned From Integrating The Divine Masculine Healing Part II“, containing my conclusions of the healing I was undergoing thru the impact of the energy wave in February.
And than there was the article about A woman’s role – Transforming an old paradigm in society and religion, where we looked into some of the details that need changing between men and women in the world, so we can come to our collective Golden Age of Aquarius. A little while ago, I ran into this lovely and
passionate article from another woman with a clear voice and something to say about all of this themes. I feel this lovely share somehow touches bits and pieces in a different language. I hope you enjoy the wonderful read!!
Love and Blessings!!

Dear Ones, a personal message, New Beginnings will be closed from June 1st till September 4th! In this time I will be posting my articles rather sporadically, expecting to pick up the daily service after that period! If you resonate with my articles and are used to find my work  shared in a Facebook group, rather sign up on my newsletter here to make sure you get the information!!!

Shared with the kind permission of Ora North:
I feel a divide growing within the spiritual movement. It has been growing slowly, almost imperceptibly. Like a frog swimming in a pot of gradually boiling water that hasn’t realized the danger he’s in.

Here it is, dare I say it: The realm of the mainstream spiritual has become shallow and dogmatic.
In an effort to reach divinity, enlightenment, and guru-status, we’ve banished and demonized the “negative” and the struggle of the human experience. We’ve lost touch with the glorious bittersweet medicine that our pain and suffering offers when truly acknowledged by the Self and the tribe, and subsequently integrated with compassion and love.
I tried. Fuck, I tried. I did the meditations, I did the training, I did the work. I focused on the positive, I focused on the light, I focused on letting go of my darkness. Just release, they said. Don’t even bring attention to what it is, they said, just release it. I advanced in my healing skills, in my awareness, in my intuition. I worked deeply with clients doing soul retrievals, secretly reveling in the shadow of the underworld.
I knew that there were those in my spiritual community who did not approve of my work. But I worked anyways, because I saw how deeply I could connect with my clients. I saw and acknowledged their pain. I focused on the integration of their experience, rather than the denial of it. I cried tears of joy when I heard of how much my work was helping them heal themselves. And at the same time, I was jealous. Why wasn’t the work healing ME? Why wasn’t I feeling better? Why wasn’t MY shit releasing?oiThat growing awareness backfired. More and more, I felt I was wading in the shallow pond of the world while my spirit was so deeply imbedded in the dark muck of the earth, in a place no one wanted to look. I was not offering the same sense of acknowledgment to myself that I offered my clients. I was still trying to uphold the notion that I was supposed to be a certain way, that I was supposed to be zen and happy all the time if I was going to be a healer. But nothing was in balance. I didn’t feel real. I didn’t feel authentic to myself. I was trapped between the worlds… I was too spiritually minded to be a muggle, but I wasn’t the right kind of spiritual for the actual spiritual community.
So I said Fuck it.
I am part of a generation of witches rising up to say Fuck it. A generation of witches that has been burned too many times, and refuses to silently wither away in the flames again.

Don’t bring your attention to the fire, they said. Just release it and let it go, they said.
But not this time. This time, we are taking those flames inside of us, acknowledging them and respecting them and feeling their searing pain, and letting them transform in our bellies so we may breathe out the fire of an awakened dragon. As awakened dragons, as millennial witches, as priestesses of the moon, as unpredictable beautiful bitches, as wild wolf women, we have a list of demands and decrees:
Our sexuality will be honored as spiritual, sacred, divine, and primal. It is communication with the divine, it is a link between heaven and earth, it is pleasure for pleasure’s sake, it is the human experience. It is a force all its own and won’t be controlled or belittled.

-And yet, our spirituality will not be sexualized, fetishized, or infantilized. The Priestess is not a fetish. The days of gurus sexually manipulating and abusing the Goddess are SO over. We’re not buying what you’re selling. No one gets to tell us how pure or impure we are, and what makes us that way, and whether we need to change that or not.

-We don’t want our spirituality to taste like candy. We don’t want rainbows and unicorns and sugary sweet confections of relentless positivity and the law of attraction. We want our spirituality to taste like dark chocolate; deep, rich, a little bitter, a little sweet, sensual and complex. We want it real, we want it deep. We won’t accept anything less.

-Many of us swear. Like, we really swear. We fucking swear a fucking lot. Deal with it. What’s a witch who doesn’t curse? (Not to mention it’s good for your brain—google that shit.)

-We will not be shamed. For our sexuality, for our lifestyles, for our choices, for the shortage of fucks that we give. Our lives, our power, our choice. Get on board or get out.jkgu-You will not tell us to simply “let go”, “clear”, or “release” our feelings and issues by way of ignoring them. We don’t just release; we integrate. We take our darkness and stew in it, letting our unique human experiences mingle with our divinity, creating a powerful form of alchemy that’s whole and complete. We know the light is only half of what makes us powerful. Once integration is complete, what is no longer needed naturally releases as a byproduct of the process.

-We do not live in binaries, so don’t categorize us in them. Don’t tell us what’s “good” and what’s “bad” because we know better than that. Don’t tell us to live in the light to banish our shadows. In fact, don’t tell us what we are or what we should do at all. We are fluid and becoming more so. Gender fluid, sexually fluid, socially fluid, spiritually fluid.

-We hold a deep respect for social and cultural issues. We won’t use “Namaste” as a substitute for “goodbye” just because it sounds spiritual. We won’t wear a bindi on our foreheads just because it’s cute. We won’t discount another’s experience and point of view just because it’s not ours. We realize that our individual path is not more important than an entire marginalized culture’s. We listen.

-“Omg I can’t say anything without someone getting offended and everything has to be sooooooo PC nowadays.” <—Nah. We don’t see it like this. We see a generation coming into their own, attempting to own their view of the world and how they’d like it to be. Clearly, there’s a growing outcry for more sensitivity and change. You could stubbornly fight it or try to understand why it’s happening. Change won’t happen without conversation, so be open to the conversation, even if you don’t see it the same way.

-Be aware when you respond to our feelings. There’s a tendency, when someone admits they are feeling something other than complete joy or satisfaction, to apologize and suggest ways to be rid of that feeling. F that noise. The only cure for feelings is to feel them. Completely. Sink into them and allow their wisdom to wash over you. We don’t wallow, but we do feel. Everything. We refuse to repress or push our feelings aside just because they make us (or you) uncomfortable. (P.S. We hardly think “You should meditate on it.” or “Have you tried going gluten free?” are appropriate responses to anything. And this is coming from someone who both meditates and is gluten free.)

-The second you use any of the new age buzzwords— manifesting abundance, the law of attraction, meditation, energy healing, authentic, etc etc— our discernment kicks the fuck in. It’s not that we don’t believe in manifestation and meditation and energy healing, we definitely do. Manifesting is our middle name. But without the realness of our human and divine darkness acknowledged by our teachers, coaches and mentors, the spiritual movement becomes oppressive and dogmatic dressed as light and love. And not to mention, manipulated for profit when the actual authenticity is not behind it, considering the growing trend. We will search you, hard, before we will work with you.light2-Maybe the most important of all, we know that Truth is found in paradox. If it’s not a contradiction in itself, we are wary. If we are not contradictions in ourselves, we are not real.

-We will not accept less than what we are. We will not be only partially ourselves because it’s prettier or happier. We will be gritty and raw and beautiful and whole. We love fiercely. Love is at the core of our beings, but we know that sometimes love is the awakened dragon burning down the bridges that no longer serve us.
Sincerely, the witches you love and fear

Source: Ora North

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