Collectively Moving On From Sexualization And Abuse

by Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
the other day I had a very interesting exchange with a friend, talking about a sentence I heard while watching a random television show. The protagonist in that reality TV show answered, when she was asked about her past as model for the Playboy Magazine, the following: “We are women! We have tits and a pussy, men are always going to sexualize us! That’s something we can’t get past!!” Honestly, the fact that she would express her observations as such radical truth truly shocked me.
But the current reality is, that f
or women in western society it has become a state of “daily normality” to be harassed, depressed or insulted on a sexual level. Currently we can see how on all levels of life, our youth is deeply effected by the porn-culture they are growing up in, and the resisting lack of authenticity as well as clarity in sexual relationships.

This is from the Article “Growing up in Pornland” by I meet girls who describe being groped in the school yard, girls routinely sexually harassed at school or on the school bus on the way home. They tell me boys act like they are entitled to girls’ bodies. Defenders of porn often say that it provides sex education. And it does: it teaches even very young boys that women and girls are always up for it. “No” in fact means yes, or persuade me.

The proliferation and globalization of hypersexualized imagery and pornographic themes makes healthy sexual exploration almost impossible. Sexual conquest and domination are untampered by the bounds of respect, intimacy and authentic human connection. Young people are not learning about intimacy, friendship and love, but about cruelty and humiliation.

So what is it we can do? One think we all can enforce together is to support women in growing into strong mothers. A masculine child does not only need the love of his mother, but also the firm hand that tells the son about boundaries and personal time for “mommy recovery”. To make it clear from the beginning on, that “mother” is apart from the provider for survival, also is a normal human being with personal needs.
Knowing that as a child, makes it easier for the adult man to accept a partners boundaries and personal desires too.

Talking to our son’s about the fact that every woman indeed has a personal way and need, how to express her own sexuality, and letting them know that it takes time to listen if one wants to discover a woman’s sexuality, also helps a lot to keep their minds open in the face of a collective over-sexualization.

And another thing we also can do now when we are women in this world, is open our mouth and share our stories. The time for silent suffering is over, the time of united healing has begun! Letting others know they are not alone and how we went through the same things they also have experienced, sets the healing even stronger into motion and shortens the time it collectively takes.This is a particularly beautiful poem which is expressing the profound pain passed on over the generations, and which has touched me deeply recently.

The poem came from the facebook page Source Medicine:
You no longer have to hold in your shame
Ancestral woman you can dance now
You no longer have to hide and stay still
Ancestral woman you can laugh now

Your laughter heals the tears of your daughters
Ancestral woman you can cry now
Cry and howl at the stars until your wounds blossom into flowers
Ancestral woman you can learn now

It’s not your fault as you let go of guilt, blame and shame
Ancestral woman you are of the Earth
You can work with herbs without persecution and death

Ancestral woman I am sorry you were a child bride
Ancestral woman I am sorry your children died
Ancestral woman I am sorry you were a slave
Ancestral woman I am sorry you were sold
Ancestral woman I am sorry you masked your pain

Ancestral woman torn by rape, war and homicide
Ancestral woman you are the woman of today
Ancestral woman and woman of today we are here to listen and learn

As we cleanse our bloodlines of persecution, fear and pain
No longer the womb of grief and devastation
Birthing and weaving the new Earth
in the womb of pleasure and creation

While this wonderful quote expressed where we wanna go on collective level:
I want to live in a society filled with people who are curious and concerned about each other rather than afraid of each other. I want to live in a world full of brave people who are willing to risk not only adventure but emotional intimacy. I want to live in a world full of explorers and generous souls rather than people who have voluntarily become prisoners of their own fortresses. I want to live in a world full of people who look into each other’s faces along the path of life and ask, “Who are you, my friend, and how can we serve each other”?
Elizabeth M. Gilbert                                             Picture Credit: Scream of The Silenced by Dave Fadden
Dear ones, we are living in a collectively intense time and that will go on for a couple of years longer, so stop holding back your authentic expression and rather go on to practice using your voice for the good of the bigger picture. We all have the responsibility to show up, if we truly want to manifest the Golden Age of Aquarius for all beings on planet earth over the coming decades.
Love and Blessings
Edith

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Clearing The Influences Of Our Sexual Past & The Twin Flame Reunion

jby Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
some of you might remember that over the last few month there where a lot of energy waves, triggering us collectively to allow a transformation in our human sexuality. For month now we have been aware, that within the collective human awakening process the sexual paradigm has to change. Over time it will show, what a role ancient teachings like tantra and the tantric principles will play in this transformation, and how the Native American Code of Ethics fits into the picture of our newly developing sexuality. In December last year
the collective cleansing of the first chakra has changed human kind, and now every individual has the chance to catch up for their personal process too.
At the end of February, the Mars retrograde phase has pushed us to face a collective healing of the divine masculine energy within, which was followed by the Twin Flame energy field of God and Goddess Meru and the threefold flame in our hearts. For many of us the time has come to step us and become goddamn warriors for authentic love. And many who feel called to bring this kind of love relationship into the world, can sense that there might be something missing. Many feel that they are ready by heart, but also seam to be held back by some invisible cords. And that might just be what truly happens. But this feeling is not there in order to hold us back forever, it is there to make us aware. Where we feel trapped, there can be old and maybe long outdated sexual connections active; are maybe past entanglements at work; or our ultimate survival pattern can be on.

A personal message to all my facebook friends!! FB is limiting the distribution of my posts daily more. If you resonate with my articles and are used to find my work  shared in a group, rather sign up on my newsletter here to make sure you get the information!!! Just type in your e-mail address in the prepared field!! Over time I might not be able to put in the FB time, if it does not lead to what it is about – SPREADING THE WORD ;-)!jkguOur physical body grows, changes and ages in 7 years cycles, that we can watch having a big impact in every human life. When our physical bodies, emotional bodies and energy bodies merge within a sexual encounter, a bound is created so strong, that it takes the body again 7 years to naturally cleans itself from the impact of this sexual interaction. And this is not only true for connections that we experience as beautiful and magical, but for every single sexual contact we had over our life. So the bill is easy to make, according to our sexual lifestyle of the last 7 years, we need to look at the cords still existing between us and our partner/s.
And some relationships, that far extend in connection beyond the material level, can have an influence on our sexual reality in the hear and now, much longer that the 7 year phase of the physical body. So if we desire to be free and cleansed from the past, and maybe even wanna call our Twin Flame connection home, than it is recommended to do so in some conscious acts of transformation and separation.

Here are some steps that help the alchemy of your heart, to transform your past:
1.) Inform yourself in this article about the alchemy of conscious breathing, how the elements within us are working for our shifts like a kubic’s cube.
2.) Make yourself familiar with the power of the violet flame. This flame is part of the crown chakra, which is the physically opposite point to the root chakra and the perfect place to start our experience (above as below). Memorize the simple prayer!!
3.) If you first up want to steer your passion for the process or increase the strength of you inner fire, repeatedly listen to this sacred song to the fire element, before you continue.
4.) Put yourself some healing music on first. Lay down on your back, seek a deep inner connection and regular breathing rhythm and bring yourself to a meditative state. Allow the parts of your physical body, that still hold memories or entanglements to teach you about the leaks in your energy field. Where ever you feel a loss of strength, energy or clarity, direct the passionate fire of your will to leave free from the past to it, and keep repeating the mantra until you can feel the energy shifting. From there on move on to the next and next spot, until your body feels light, liberated and yours.
TIP: Don’t bother wanting to know which encounter had which impact, or even what person of your life left that fingerprint in you!! Simply know that if you need the information in order to heal, it will come to you.. if not, not!
This process can get quite intense in times, so take good care of yourself by preparing well…. have a placket and some water with you.. and reserve time so the flow is not limited by the clock!!
5.) When you feel that your vessel is empty for that moment, cuddle up and keep resting for as long as it feels right for you. Resist the need to understand what happened and rather allow the energy to work a bit for you.
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Dear Ones, I hope this insides and steps will help you on your way to freedom from your sexual past!! I hope you can let go with ease and grace, from the dynamics and pain that still might have a hold on you. I wish you all a wonderful time with the integration of this intense process, and may there be endless blessings for you to come!! And if you desire to meet your soul partner, don’t forget it is your inner clarity that attracts!
Blessings an Love ;-)!
Edith

If you enjoy my posts, please sign up for my daily newsletter, JUST CLICK HERE & Enter your e-mail. Please also like New Beginnings Guatemala on Facebook, and keep up the good work spreading the word ;-)! Feel INVITED to share this post also on your website or social media, just keep the links and credit active PLEASE! THANKS!

What Differentiates Being Sexually Dominated From Being Abused

17lu7bfxzx0btjpgby Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
over the last few month I shared a lot of posts about human sexuality; the changing sexual paradigm within the collective human awakening process; the role of tantra and tantric principles in this collective transformation; what impact it has on men when they watch porn on a regular level; the brave sharing of a brother who decided “no longer procrasturbating his life away“; the passionate call of a beautiful soul to become goddamn warriors for authentic love again, and how the collective cleansing of the first chakra has changed human kind on a sexual level forever; and even what to be aware of to identify a spiritual sexual predator.
And now this article was send to me, unfortunately I don’t know the author, bringing up the important question in differentiation between a chosen, sexually dominating encounter and an abusive situation. It can be hard to know if you’re being abused or if your own behavior is abusive. One may think that a ruff way to approach sexuality is “just natural” and the other might experience it as abusive. For some a little physical pain or sexually threatening words are not abuse, for others it might scare the living daylight out of them.
Also sexual abuse does not always start in the bedroom. For example monitoring the partner in what ever he/she is doing, consciously limiting the partners time or possibilities to talk to members of the other sex and even, overly strong control of how the other spends his/her money, can be part of a sexual abusive, dominant behavior. Sometimes a relationship might not be abusive, but it might have serious problems that in the moment make it unhealthy to sexually interact with another. Who ever you are with, in a health relationship you should be to be yourself, to take care of yourself and feeling like your partner supports you as you are.fightbackRead here what the conscious brother has to share about his personal discoveries:
Much discussion, and with it a lot of disagreement on the matter, is whether women enjoy being “taken”. The fantasy of a man coming into their room and grabbing them, throwing them against a wall, and fucking them senseless is a common fantasy. Other women with past trauma of various kinds react to the above paragraph and call it abuse.
So what is a man to do? On one hand we are told women wants a “bad boy” with confidence bordering on arrogance. In the same breath, we hear we are to be the sensitive man in tune with his feelings, understanding the needs of women. It isn’t that complicated; I am discovering. (I didn’t say women aren’t complicated, the study of this fairer sex is never ending and a life-long pursuit which shall never be fully completed). However, knowing what a woman wants is not something that we should EVER cross over into being abusive. Confident, sexy, strong, and aggressive may, depending on the woman you are with, be a huge part of your relationship, but crossing over to where the woman doesn’t feel safe is never something any man should ever do, and in so doing claim ignorance.
You know. Period. It’s in her eyes.You can read trust in a woman’s eyes like a grade three book. It’s there in black and white, written for you to see. She will project it to you even in the most erotic situations. Look deep in her eyes, and read what she is writing for you. Sometimes, she will want you to man up and grab her; some want it rough and with a sense of you proclaiming your dominance over her at that moment. Other times, she wants you to look into her eyes, and just caress her cheek, nothing more. Kisses, love and tenderness. For some women, other times it’s begging to be slapped on the ass. How do you read the signs? If you are new to this and have never played a more dominant role, have an honest discussion.aAsk her!
And not when you are both wound up like a top sexually and ready to fuck each other, but when you are sitting over a cup of coffee. Ask her what her fantasies are. Ask her specifically if she has ever imagined being taken. Blindfolded or dominated in any way. You may be surprised. It’s not every woman’s fantasy, but it is for more women than you may think. Woman want to be desired, deeply wanted for their body, their mind, their soul. They want a warrior to conquer them. They want a real man to “want” them so bad they see lust and desire in your eyes. And in the midst of all of this, they must feel safe and loved. Why is the rape fantasy still one of the highest ranking fantasies for a woman? I believe it is precisely this. A woman wants to be wanted.
They desire a strong man who owns his masculinity unashamedly, yet with a deep respect for her femininity. She wants to feel that your eyes are staring at her body with lust; that when you are caressing her it means something so much deeper. That if they trust you enough to tie them up and spank their ass, it is not because they love to feel pain necessarily, but because it speaks to the desire you have to dominate them in a way that, in a circular way, has them really in charge of your desire. Focused completely and un-distracted on them and their sexuality. Where the line must never, ever, be crossed is going to a point where she doesn’t feel safe or has crossed into the world that makes her feel you are taking, and she has not given permission. There is no excuse for abuse. Ever.

Ever.
Tricky, yes. A scene in lovemaking might look the same between two people on two different days, and one day it is true loving sex, and the same scene a day later may be abuse. The difference? Permission and trust. And both of these are in her eyes. Look deeply. You will know. So to myself and all men: man up and consume your lady. That might mean chains and leather, or it might mean a hot tub with wine. Ask the hard questions, and be ready to explore a little outside of your comfort zone. You might be surprised to what levels your sexual enjoyment might reach.h

Dear Ones, I have to say I really like this piece. I enjoy the way how honest the author is and also many of his details are close to my personal and professional experience. One thing is for sure, female sexuality can only unfold in its true beauty and depths, when we feel desired, safe and truly seen as who we are… but than, maybe man actually feel that way too?? I would love to hear about your ecperience!!!
Deep Love, Blessings & Safe Sex ;-)!!
Edith

If you enjoy my posts and desire to sign up for the daily newsletter, you find a button on the right bar of my page. Please also like New Beginnings Guatemala on Facebook, and keep up the good work spreading the word ;-)! Feel INVITED to share this post also on your website or social media, just keep the links and credit active PLEASE! THANKS!

How To Chose The Right Person To Assist You On Your Awakening Path

spiritual-teacherby Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
during the last few month of the year 2015 of personal power and abundance, an increased amount of political-, religious-,  spiritual-, and community leader all over the planet have been accused of abusive behavior on emotional-, financial and sexual level. The energies created by the collective awakening of humanity and the frequencies that had been building up to the collective cleansing of the first chakra we experienced, have provided the forces needed to unveil many second agendas of our world power figures.
So how to find the right person when you feel a little in need of direction, in a world where spiritual teacher seem to be available on every street corner these days?? Depending on our personal path of awakening, it can be very helpful for a certain period of time, if we join a group and practices our mind-body-emotion-spirit awareness with others. A challenge appears, when a strong attachment is build and a person gets stuck in the feeling of needing the teacher, the cult, the guru or the group – in order to feel their own divine connection. Any to close identification with the personality of the groups leader/teacher would then become an obstacle for our awakening, self-empowerment and enlightenment.

The following list is created to clarify some common perceptions, for a better chance to recognize authentic spiritual teacher. If you are seeking guidance in this moment, I hope this article serves you as a guideline to attract the right fit!aaDo you feel selflessness in your teachers service?
A helpful teacher is one, that does not need emotional support or positive feedback from the people he/she is sharing their knowledge with. Generally serving other people means serving in a way, that truly benefits the receiver. The teacher is payed by your financial compensation and the personal growth that is naturally coming from holding space for others. If you feel your teacher emotionally-, mentally or spiritually being in need of your approval  – WALK AWAY!!

Do you feel your teacher lives his/her life with intention?
Creating life with intention – is living life with purpose. People who live their life intentionally are in charge of their own destiny and understand how co-creation with the universe works. Traits very helpful when operating as a teacher.
A sign of intentional living is mindfulness! You can see a mindful mindset in the way  a person  talks to you. In the way your words are received, processed and responded to. Also recognize mindfulness in the way people move their body or touch and treat things. Pay attention to what your gut feeling is telling you!

Does your teacher integrate in his/her life what he/she teaches?
Don’t be shy to ask a potential teacher how they live their lives. Ask if the techniques and mindset they teach, is also the way they live. Is the leaders personal practice similar to the teachings they share?
Do they practice to stay in a constant contact with their own divine guidance? Authentic teachers serve as vehicles for higher consciousness. In order to be able to do so, a strong and steady connection with their own personal guides is mandatory.

Does you teacher continue to grow him/her self?
Mastering your personal energy includes a deep understanding of the immortality of our soul, traveling the spiral dance of creation. In such a dance, there is no beginning and no end – while here on earth we constantly experience the death of a situation, relationship, physical thing, in order to have the chance for a new beginning.
A wise person understands to translate that fact into constant, self-chosen growth. People on the path of self-mastery seek daily practice, for the sake of never ending spiritual, mental and emotional growth.

aaaDo you hear humility in your teachers words?
Humility is emerges, when we understand our true powerful greatness as creating human beings – and put it in the right proportion to the greatness of the universe, the divine plan, the forces of the elements and the power of divine love. In the life of Jesus Christ, we can see such authentic humility. A person so powerful – so connected to his golden I AM presence – that he could heal instantly AND so small, he never felt to superior to serve another human being in need, with his outstanding abilities.
So, humility is not so much about not having anything or charging money or the amount of compensation you pay for received services – it is about experiencing bliss, gratitude and contentment in having the capacity to serve in this world! This are true signs of authentic spiritual humility. If you find a person like that – make yourself a bed in their backyard!!

Can you feel an attachment free approach in your teachers work?
The world we live in functions on a divine level – under the law of detachment. This law says:
Already when something starts, it is perfect;
Who shows up is exactly who is supposed to be there;
What happens is the only thing that possibly can happen;
And when it is over – it is over….
So what does that mean? It means, that working with the soul and the other world is always a non predictable situation. So non-attachment is about accepting what ever the outcome of or work is. It is important that you feel free with the person who serves you as teacher. That you feel they are ok with what ever you decide for your healing, your next step, your personal path. Conclusion: a person, who serves as an authentic spiritual teacher, should not add to your inner pressure with expectations or demands about your personal growth process .encourage aDo you feel free to ask questions and post constructive critic?
A truthful teacher will always be interested in answering your questions. At the same time – it is in your teachers hands and responsibility, to only give you as much information at a time, as you can handle. Nobody is served with a total overload on news that can not be taken in. A good teacher will feel when it is the right time, to give you the next piece – the next layer of information. That’s the job! And, nobody is perfect – we are all human beings who make mistakes or can be misunderstood. An authentic teacher will not have a problem when you are sharing constructive feedback. To the opposite – if you tell them how they can help you even better, how they can communicate even clearer or reach your heart easily – they will be thankful for the chance to adjust their service and grow from it!
If your teacher only offers his/her support if you are joining an exclusive community, a special tribe or a cult-like group that has been formed around them, than check the facts well!! Make sure their teaching do not involve manipulation and control of the members and their mindset.

Dear Ones, I hope this simple guidelines can be of help for you, if you are looking out for an authentic person to help you make the next step in your personal development!! Where ever you are in this beautiful world – I wish you authentic, kind and playful guidance from loving and wise teacher on this side of the veil, and from your spirit guides from the other world!
Blessings and Happy Awakening!!
Edith

If you enjoy my posts and desire to sign up for the daily newsletter, you find a button on the right bar of my page. Please also like New Beginnings Guatemala on Facebook, and keep up the good work spreading the word ;-)! Feel INVITED to share this post also on your website or social media, just keep the links and credit active PLEASE! THANKS!