the other day I had a very interesting exchange with a friend, talking about a sentence I heard while watching a random television show. The protagonist in that reality TV show answered, when she was asked about her past as model for the Playboy Magazine, the following: “We are women! We have tits and a pussy, men are always going to sexualize us! That’s something we can’t get past!!” Honestly, the fact that she would express her observations as such radical truth truly shocked me.
But the current reality is, that for women in western society it has become a state of “daily normality” to be harassed, depressed or insulted on a sexual level. Currently we can see how on all levels of life, our youth is deeply effected by the porn-culture they are growing up in, and the resisting lack of authenticity as well as clarity in sexual relationships.
This is from the Article “Growing up in Pornland” by I meet girls who describe being groped in the school yard, girls routinely sexually harassed at school or on the school bus on the way home. They tell me boys act like they are entitled to girls’ bodies. Defenders of porn often say that it provides sex education. And it does: it teaches even very young boys that women and girls are always up for it. “No” in fact means yes, or persuade me.
The proliferation and globalization of hypersexualized imagery and pornographic themes makes healthy sexual exploration almost impossible. Sexual conquest and domination are untampered by the bounds of respect, intimacy and authentic human connection. Young people are not learning about intimacy, friendship and love, but about cruelty and humiliation.
So what is it we can do? One think we all can enforce together is to support women in growing into strong mothers. A masculine child does not only need the love of his mother, but also the firm hand that tells the son about boundaries and personal time for “mommy recovery”. To make it clear from the beginning on, that “mother” is apart from the provider for survival, also is a normal human being with personal needs.
Knowing that as a child, makes it easier for the adult man to accept a partners boundaries and personal desires too.
Talking to our son’s about the fact that every woman indeed has a personal way and need, how to express her own sexuality, and letting them know that it takes time to listen if one wants to discover a woman’s sexuality, also helps a lot to keep their minds open in the face of a collective over-sexualization.
And another thing we also can do now when we are women in this world, is open our mouth and share our stories. The time for silent suffering is over, the time of united healing has begun! Letting others know they are not alone and how we went through the same things they also have experienced, sets the healing even stronger into motion and shortens the time it collectively takes.This is a particularly beautiful poem which is expressing the profound pain passed on over the generations, and which has touched me deeply recently.
The poem came from the facebook page Source Medicine:
You no longer have to hold in your shame
Ancestral woman you can dance now
You no longer have to hide and stay still
Ancestral woman you can laugh now
Your laughter heals the tears of your daughters
Ancestral woman you can cry now
Cry and howl at the stars until your wounds blossom into flowers
Ancestral woman you can learn now
It’s not your fault as you let go of guilt, blame and shame
Ancestral woman you are of the Earth
You can work with herbs without persecution and death
Ancestral woman I am sorry you were a child bride
Ancestral woman I am sorry your children died
Ancestral woman I am sorry you were a slave
Ancestral woman I am sorry you were sold
Ancestral woman I am sorry you masked your pain
Ancestral woman torn by rape, war and homicide
Ancestral woman you are the woman of today
Ancestral woman and woman of today we are here to listen and learn
As we cleanse our bloodlines of persecution, fear and pain
No longer the womb of grief and devastation
Birthing and weaving the new Earth
in the womb of pleasure and creation
While this wonderful quote expressed where we wanna go on collective level:
I want to live in a society filled with people who are curious and concerned about each other rather than afraid of each other. I want to live in a world full of brave people who are willing to risk not only adventure but emotional intimacy. I want to live in a world full of explorers and generous souls rather than people who have voluntarily become prisoners of their own fortresses. I want to live in a world full of people who look into each other’s faces along the path of life and ask, “Who are you, my friend, and how can we serve each other”?
Elizabeth M. Gilbert Picture Credit: Scream of The Silenced by Dave Fadden
Dear ones, we are living in a collectively intense time and that will go on for a couple of years longer, so stop holding back your authentic expression and rather go on to practice using your voice for the good of the bigger picture. We all have the responsibility to show up, if we truly want to manifest the Golden Age of Aquarius for all beings on planet earth over the coming decades.
Love and Blessings
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