Within the New Relationship Paradigm – Our Sexuality Is Secret!

saby Edith Boyer-Telmer

Dear Friends,
in the last couple of month a lot of my clients expressed a newly discover need, to evaluate their personal expression of their sexuality and other physical desires. This is a natural side effect of the human collectives inner changes towards our new relationship paradigms, the balancing of the divine masculine and the divine feminine energies and the grounding of this harmony into everyday life. It seams like we are really close to the completed picture, as many feel their sexuality seams to be some kind of paradox… Something people really feel driven now, to talk about… and at the same time feel like it should be so natural and easy, there is nothing to talk about…
The beauty of this moment is, that a paradox in itself is ONENESS! It represents the two poles of the circle… just like masculine and feminine are. And while they are poles on the circle of life, they are also one within this circle.
In relation to our sexuality that means, that the bigger picture is not either or but as well as. We should feel naturally drown to each other by heart and physical attraction. Should as naturally come together as possible, in purity of sharing our true being with each other. And, we should talk about it a lot! Exchange who we really are in order to meet on levels so profound, we never even imagined we could be able to connect.

Here are some simple steps to come to a place of openness and sharing, which leads to the true divine purpose of sexuality… the unification of poles, that once thought they are living in separation and in sexuality finally can feel – they always HAVE BEEN ONE!!

1. Know your Bio-Rhythm

Did you know that there are a variety of body rhythms that can increase or lower our sexual response? This rhythms are creating better or worse times to enjoy and / or encourage sexual activity! So one way to make sure your sex-life is happening at a time where you truly connect with each other in body-mind and soul, is to know when you highest physical respond to sexuality is. To go a step further you can look at both charts and see when you are both at the peak of your physical desire. Make it a game rather than a sign of success, to watch the different levels of intensity, closeness and connection you experience during the many phases of your bio-rhythm.ghh2. Know the time of day you enjoy

Over the years of sharing tantric teachings, I met a lot of people who expressed their frustration and irritations, over feeling internally disconnected from their natural rhythms and cycles. And here I have to make clear “Ladies.. the pill was not a blessing!!” and, on a deeper level it was not brought to us by the pharma industry, to create the field and possibility for women to explore their sexuality in freedom… it was spread all over the world to disconnect women from their divine connection to the rhythms and cycles of the universe, that our physical bodies sensory-self naturally is aware of. So go back and feel yourself again!! Don’t make your sexuality another appointment in your busy calendar! It’s a time to be with yourself, while you share your energy field, emotional field and physical body with somebody else. Know if you like morning-sex or not, know if you enjoy being woken up in the middle of the night, be aware if you need routine or surprise, … and share this knowledge with your partner.

3. Never abuse your sexuality

What ever your own truth and personal expression of this truth is when it comes to your sexuality, don’t ever abuse yourself when you share it!! Doing so can open up a wormhole of emotional and psychological issues!! Issues with a profound negative effects on your mental, emotional and physical health. You might ask yourself, but what is abuse in this case? If you share your sexuality with an individual you feel uncomfortable with or you are even scared of, having petty sex, sharing sex when you’re angry, having sex with someone you don’t feel connected with or have bad feelings for, having sex when either person isn’t feeling well, having half unconscious sex on alcohol or drugs – these are all expressions of abuse! As long as you abuse your sexuality on any of this levels, your sexual expression is contaminated with the vibration of this abuses!

4. Know your level of desire

I have to confess, human sexuality is a pretty tricky thing!! As soon as a single thing kind of “goes wrong” it has the power to mess with our heads pretty badly. In the moment we are aware of that and look at it from an outside perspective, we already take back some of our lost power. So when it comes to desire, to the fire of passion, the wish to physically feel so much… we need to do share in clarity… Talk to each other!! Share with your partner that you are only really “hot for it” one time the week, even that their need is maybe 4 times. Speak openly and fearless and look together for solutions!! We need to understand that our partners desire and drive for sexuality – is a completely personal thing – just like our own is, and that it has nothing to do with the quality of the relationship, the love your partner has for you or how desirable he/she finds you. From that perspective – why not let him masturbate in the bedroom (instead of hidden behind the closed bathroom door), maybe be present and simple watch… could even add extra pepper ;-)!! Ok is, what ever it is that fits for you, your partner and your co-creative relationship! Make this decisions together, and it will create a deep level of trust and gratitude for another!!nkj5. Be present with all your senses

Sex is an essential part of life. It’s for our health and well-being as important, as our nutrition or our sleep cycles are. Sex in its divine expression is not simple a physical act, but the union of two bodies, minds, souls and emotional bodies. When we approach it that way, sex becomes a spiritually fulfilling experience. And, it can only be experienced within the physical body – soaked in with all its senses. The environment, the food,the music and the lighting you choose, all play an important role in developing intimacy, closeness and emotional comfort. Take time to prepare, enjoy the feeling of “inviting your lover”, play with your imagination, get excited in your mind – and than allow this excitement to have its way with you and your partner!

I hope my sharing brought you some inspiration, maybe a little bit direction but most of all, joy for a brand new paradigm of a collective sacred human sexuality!!
Blessings in Extasis!

Edith

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30 comments on “Within the New Relationship Paradigm – Our Sexuality Is Secret!

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